Wednesday, December 24, 2008

What’s Up With All the Skinny Santas?

I have noticed a very disturbing trend this Christmas season – Skinny Santa’s. I’ve been bumping in to them everywhere and it just isn’t right to see a Santa with his clothes barley hanging on, with his black belt tightened all the way up.

My first encounter with a skinny Santa was at my son’s kindergarten Christmas production at school the other day. The high point of the production was when Santa road in on a tri-cycle with a woman on the back dressed up as an elf. Okay so that part was cool. But when he got off the “tri” it was obvious that he couldn’t have weighed more than a buck thirty. Come on!

Then later that afternoon I’m driving across town with my kids and see Santa out in front of a local car wash soliciting business. Again this dude was scrawny. Then I get home and turn on CNN to see a story about a Santa somewhere, and this guy was a skinny Santa as well.

I don’t know if there is some kind of memo that is being circulated amongst those in the Santa industry telling them that they need to shed some pounds but it sure seems like the jolly old obese variety of Santa is definitely the minority this year (at least in my neck of the woods).

Perhaps it’s a sign of the hard times, maybe it’s in protest to the growing epidemic of obesity in this country, but it just don’t seem right. And by the way, my kids aren’t buying it either. So please, all of you vocational Santas out there, do us a favor and either start eating more, quit smoking, or stuff some pillows in your suit.


scottie said...

First they removed the Cookie Monster from Sesame Street, and now Santa is on a health-kick!!

This is an abomination!!

scottie said...
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curia_regis said...

I read an article somewhere online about advocating skinny Santas due to obesity or Type II Diabeetus or something ridiculous like that.

I heard on some local radio program recently that 40% of either LA or the US is "obese", which makes the Santa Claus bit even more ridiculous in that it shouldn't be that hard to find a fat guy.

Now finding a jolly old one (whose retirement portfolio (thanks to the recession) is likely worth reindeer feed) is a different story altogether...